Returning to My Body: A Story About Body Image.

In life, we all get busy. We work during our lunch break, watch Netflix during dinner, and scroll on social media during breakfast. All of these experiences take ourselves out of the present moment and our bodies during a time where ideally we would be responding to hunger, fullness, and satisfaction cues without distraction. We get busy and take movement off the priority list which is ideally a time to breathe and be present with your body. I get busy and I prioritize work and productivity over presence and making time to BE in my body. 

Last summer I had a peaceful and loving relationship with my body. I noticed and responded to hunger and fullness cues and exercised in ways that connected my breath with movement. Well, then my life changed. I moved, started a new job, began my dietetic internship, and experienced what it was like to relapse into a strained and distanced relationship with my body. My intuition in all areas of my life was muted. The inner knowing of what I wanted to eat, wear, say, feel, etc was lost. And I had no idea why. All I knew at the time was that I didn’t feel as at home in my body as I once had and I desperately wanted that feeling back. 

Fast forward to May of 2022. I’m on a plane on my way to a yoga retreat in the Dominican Republic and I take out my journal to write about my intentions for this experience. The underlying theme was that I wanted to get back IN my body. I wanted to feel great in my own skin, good in the swimsuits I brought, and I didn’t want to waste time in the 6 days I had in this beautiful country with amazing people. 

I and 14 other people stayed in the Dominican Tree House Village in Samaná and I mean actual treehouses with curtains for walls, in the jungle. No wifi, no TV’s, no distractions. I was completely unplugged. And with no distractions and the lovely humans I was surrounded by, I was able to return to my body. I enjoyed 3 meals a day with friends, I did short yoga sessions twice a day, I spent 100% of my time hearing the sounds and feeling the atmosphere of the environment. I dressed for comfort, not to impress. I was vulnerable with the other attendees and I left myself feel everything all the time. It was a beautiful experience of returning to myself and opening up with other humans. I cried every single day I was there! About what? I still don’t know. Maybe it was release of emotions that I’d been feeling but ignoring because I didn’t make space for them. Maybe it was relief to have nothing expected of me and no expectations of myself other that to connect with my body.

My biggest learning from this trip was this - distractions take us out of the present moment, out of our bodies. Having free time in day to day life to take a moment and connect with what’s going on inside my head and my heart is so important. 

I know that I can’t quit my jobs and throw my phone away for the rest of my life in order to be present in my body, but I can make sure I practice yoga most days of the week. I can make sure I have at least one meal a day without distractions. I can make sure I make time for connection, and I can cultivate the loving, gentle parts of myself. It was 5 days and a lot of learning and presence that taught me tools to incorporate into my everyday life to find more peace. 

If you find yourself disconnected to your body and the present moment, I encourage you to close your eyes. Tune into your breath. Put one hand on your heart and one hand on your belly, and breath. Feel the body that carries you through each day and know that nothing is wrong with it. Notice your heartbeat pushing nutrients and oxygen throughout your body. Notice your belly rise with your breath and express gratitude for your lungs. In this moment where you feel your body underneath you, send loving thoughts to your body. Soften your mind. Find the love in your heart. Find peace in presence. Make time every single week to return to yourself. 

Lastly, if a yoga retreat in the Caribbean comes across your radar, sign up and see what happens! 

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Written by

Hey, I'm Chelsea!

I’m a 200-hr yoga instructor, cat mom, and soon to be RD! As HSH Office Manager I love all things intuitive eating + movement and I’m glad you’re here! Learn more about me and the HSH offerings here.